Indelible Musings

There's so much on my mind, Facebook What all should I write? You have space, I know To take in my rants But does everyone around have the time To read and comprehend What's on my mind? I have been trying- struggling To come to terms with What's best in me? What's best for me? What's in store for me? I have been trying- to stay calm But the humdrum in my fickle mind Refuses to die. The pen and the paper stare at me from the shelves of my cupboard I look away fearing it's a waste of time, Yet, my heart yearns to take them together and flow with the movements of one on the other. There's so much on my mind, Faceboook What all should I write? There are hundreds on my friend list, Not one to lend an ear, Everyone is moving along in their world, While I crib and cry.

That moment when I sit and wonder, Where am I headed? I struggle to come to a conclusion, I cry and whine at my inability To see the strength in me, All I can see is the pile of defeat The unsuccessful attempts The mismanaged life cycle The surmounting debts. That moment when I sit and contemplate How I should focus on the present And forget the future But, Alas! The future has Caught me in its web Entangled, and without a sign of freeing, I struggle to pull out of the web The intensity with which the web has woven itself around me makes me shudder. That moment when I sit and decide It's time to call it the end of the road No, there hasn't been a speck of Light at the end of this dark road I tried, I struggled, I fought, I caught But I failed, Failed quite miserably. I fear, I fear the society, I fear the people I love, I fear my own self, I guess it is THAT MOMENT When I should quit...

Disclaimer: The views expressed in this post are my personal. They may vary from people to people and be different for different circumstances.  What is fear? A feeling that creeps in when you fail to or are unable to fulfill a certain task. Fear comes in unannounced. You may fear because you genuinely feel it or you may fear for the heck of it. But the question is should you give into your fear? OR should you rise above all that is pulling you down to that extreme? In most circumstances, the tendency is to give into the fear. How many times do we actually sit back, think and try to steer away from the thought of 'quitting'? Nobody really wants to quit. It is the circumstances, situations, behaviors, thoughts that rules our actions. It is probably also the emotional quotient that tends to be on the higher side while dealing with a situation that causes the fear. Not just the emotional quotient, the whole thought about "what will they say"?; 'they' here ...

 There are 'people' everywhere around  Some generous, Some miserly Some extrovert, Some introvert,  But they are everywhere around,  from where you stand. Then, there are people who do good, They will do anything to make you smile, They will fetch you brownies from your favorite patisserie, They will send you flowers from far across, They will shower you with gifts that you love, They will be by your side through thick and thin, They will be on their toes to help you win. Then, there are people who would 'act' to do good, Donning the hat of being most effervescent, They will make you feel that you are better than the rest, Behind your back,  They will hatch every conspiracy at their best, They will laugh with you at others, Behind your back,  They will make your life worse than others, Cheery, Smiling, Cracking jokes, Going out for smoke, They would do it all, like you are partners in crime,  Behind you...