The Road to a Successful Marriage
Disclaimer: This post was written for a website, however, since I did not get any revert with respect to the post; I decided to upload it on my blog. These are my personal views. They might be different from others. So, please read it keeping an open mind :-)
"To Love someone is nothing, to be loved by someone is something but to be loved by the one you love is everything"- Paulo Coelho
Indeed, love is not a thing but a feeling that is felt by each one of us. Often this love culminates into a beautiful relationship giving birth to marriage. But as time elapses, this beautiful relationship turns into something that we are alien to. Why does it happen? Don’t you feel like celebrating the 25th 50th or 75th many such jubilees with your better half? Of course, you do. Let us observe what makes a marriage successful.
For any marriage, be it love or arranged, the first and most important thing is to build trust. Once you are married to someone, that person not only becomes your husband or wife but shares a part of your life like your parents or siblings. Hence, it is important that you develop a bond of trust so that if a situation ever arose on whether a decision can be left on either of you, the other person should have the confidence in the decision-making power of the other.
Naturally, if you build trust, you are bound to understand each other well. Your positives, negatives, shortcomings all go ignored or are well understood by your better half. The more you understand the situation that your better half is in, the easier it becomes for him/her to talk to you. Moreover, it builds an environment, where a husband or a wife can freely discuss about issues that they might not be able to share with their parents or friends.
Coming to friends, we all have that one friend who is either our partner in crime or is the one on whose shoulders we can rely.
Why not make your better half that friend? Every relation needs to have a friendly touch to it. Being friends does not mean just to hang out and enjoy your time over the weekends. Remember? A friend in need is a friend in deed? Who better can manage to be your friend in need than your better half? From rescuing you from the scrutinizing tone of your in-laws to making you strong enough to face the wrath of your bosses at work; they can give you the best of company at 3 in the night and be your agony aunt whenever you are in doubt. So make your spouse your friend and you shall always have the trust and understandings develop mutually.
Further, giving space to each other is also another important mantra to keep in mind for a successful marriage. Never try to crossover your spouse’s life. Everyone has their own way of leading a life. Till the time, their ways and terms are not hampering your relationship, why bother by suppressing their desires. The more space you give your spouse, the less nagging and aggressive they will be towards you. Moreover, if you are receiving ample love, care and attention from your spouse, why not reminisce those by letting them be in their own space.
If trust, understanding, giving space and being friends with each other helps nurture a beautiful relationship, it is obvious that love will bloom. It is not necessary that you have to have a love marriage to understand the true essence of love. An arrange marriage too can lead to a beautiful culmination of love that you might never have experienced before.
Be a patient listener. Listen to what your spouse has to say at the end of the day. There might be things that may have hurt them; there might be things that are troubling them. Listening and comforting them, could be the best solution for them at that moment.
If one has to chart down the tips for a successful marriage, the list may go on and on. It might not be necessary that every couple will follow the same points. With every couple, situation will be different so will be the surroundings. Time and again, they will grow together to understand how to tackle a particular situation together. A marriage not only means coming together of two people. It also leads to building a relationship that can last forever, if handled with maturity and care.